Tears Turned Angry.

Separated myself from
Society, slam the door and throw
Away the key. 

Nobody understands the
Complicity of my emotions.
Nobody, except me.

My whole life I've given everyone
Respect, just never thought to respect
Myself first before I allow myself
To give respect to others.

My trust to open up and
Expose my vulnerabilities,
Has never been easy.

Listen.

Do you hear it?

My heart is yelling at the
Loudest of volumes, as it bangs
Its fists repeatedly on the barred
Wall of my inner chest.

Even though my voice is stuck on mute.

I've been painted as the red flag
On legs, I'm just doing all I can to
Keep my heart safe and that's the
Truth.

Whenever I opened up about
What I've gone through in the
Past, it always ended the same way.
I've heard it all.

In dismissal.

The, "you're just being dramatic."
The, "what a debby downer."
The, "you're exaggerating."
The, "what a party pooper."
The, "it's all in your head."

So I separated myself
Further still, only crying when
On my own.

Tears of sadness and loneliness,
Turn into tears of frustration and anger.
Tired of replying on autopilot, the
Automatic "I'm fine."

It's like...
...my mind is trapped in
A padded cell with no windows,
No escape from Hell.

I'm in an emotional strait-jacket,
But I refuse to give up without a
Fight!

Even the dead know how
That one day they too, will come
Back to life.

I am determined to pick up
The once discarded key, and unlock
The love that lives in my heart.

I'm making a protest For mental
Health, progressing by stating facts
In every way I know how.

No matter where I am.

What once were tears of sadness
And isolation, roll back and regain
Position into the bottom lids of my
Eyes where they belong.

My vision is clear now, clearer
Than it's ever been.

They are on a mission to shine with joy.

But wait! There's more. The plot
Thickens.

Should a tear be sneaky
Enough to slide down my cheek
In an attempt to escape?

I assure you, it will be a
Tear shed out of happiness.
Make no mistake.

When someone you love passes
Away and walks over the rainbow
Bridge, they leave the shape of
Themselves as a gaping hole in your
Life.

A void that is almost impossible
To fill. 

Depression out of grief
Shows up uninvited and knocks on
The door of your pain.

But because you were raised
To always be polite, out of habit you
Reply, "Come in."

And just like that, it's now
Living inside you rent free.
It tries day and night to establish
It's dominance, by becoming
The worst roommate ever.

Hoarding your emotions and
Refusing to leave, until one day
You gather up the courage to
Kick it out.

At times it will visit, but only
You hold the power not to let it
In.

To get rid of what is not wanted,
Not needed or what will dilute your
Mind. 

The only energy you must
Invite, is positivity into your
Life like a moth drawn to a
Flame.

You are an incredible sense of
Inspiration, a mascot for potential
Fellow mental illness survivors.
Keep. On. Fighting.

- Alexandra Pierotti.